Day 7: talk more, screen less.


One thing I have loved about thus first week with my 31 minute internet limit is that it has seriously opened up the lines of communication with my husband.
It used to be we’d spend our evenings on our screens. Him with a laptop/movie/desktop combo working/facebooking/working and me on the iPad facebooking, Sometimes reading on the kindle app and almost unceasingly checking blogs.

I thought it was him closing down the talk zone with his need to not be talked to while on the computer working.

But as it turns out it was me without hardly realizing it.

I was completely caught up in the virtual world waiting for my husband to finish working so I could get attention.

Whereas my husband was just working because I was busy and he didn’t want to interrupt.

Kinda a lose-lose situation.

My internal excuse when he mentioned the difference this week: “you could’ve interrupted me!” but even as I thought that I knew it wasn’t where the problem was. He was being completely respectful honoring his boundaries concerning computer time: It’s his work; he needs to focus; interruptions are to be avoided.

I have none of those preconceptions about my computer time. Mine are more: it’s play. Talk to me whenever you want. It was hard for me at the beginning of our marriage to understand I needed to be quiet when he was on the computer and not just talk at him whenever. (It’s still hard actually).

Somehow I didn’t realize he was very carefully giving me that same space and I was shutting down conversations before they even happened just by not being completely available.

Needless to say this week’s epiphany has been an agreeable one for both of us.

I was just shocked on Tuesday night by the amount my husband talked to me. The talking has continued throughout the week and has been a lovely revelation. I am grateful that it only went this long before I figured that out.

I am so glad for this challenge to change my habits and that God kept pushing me to to do it.

I definitely want to keep all this open time with my husband and for accomplishing things as I reevaluate my screen time at the end of this month.

(Ranger likes Sesame Street on Netflix for a few minutes at a time. Especially if he’s in his daddy’s lap ‘working’ on his keyboard same as daddy. :) It makes for a freakishly adorable 3 and a half minutes.)

Other activities today included running 2 miles before the daddy even woke up. Crocheting on that blanket from day 2. A couple loads of laundry. A clean kitchen. Some reading. And some good thought time. It was a decently productive day.

(This is a part of 31 days to Focus and Refresh a blog series my mom, sister and I are hosting as we spend 31 minutes a day improving our hearts, homes, and habits in the month of October.We would love your company!)

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