I Miss Your Face {When Siblings Grow Up}

It’s siblings day.

And I miss my siblings.

I see them every once in a while even though we live near enough to most all of them more often than we do.

But, life is busy and even though I see them, I feel like we’ve lost each other along the way.

We’re in an odd space where all of us are very busy in very different ways. Life’s overwhelming. We all need different amounts of space. There’s always stuff to process and shit that goes down without permission. And then we have to process that. And maybe need more space.

And the years tick on.

It’s normal.

And there’s time.

And this is life.

The daily strange and ordinary.

But I feel the gap of all of us siblings growing up one by one and all at once. I feel the lack of not being in the same place nearly so much by chance anymore. And I’m realizing how hard it is to feel connected across the helterskelter divide of life. The kid-life habits of seeing each other when we see each other don’t work anymore. But the risk of making actual plans and reaching out asking the questions to actually making plans is really hard. And sometimes feels like a big risk as now we all get to choose who we hang out with.

But the questions are aching to be asked.

I want that background chaos of knowing we each have a ready nine people there for us; taking time, asking good questions, and just showing up for each other when life is unpredictable or ridiculous.

In this grown-up sibling world,
we have to, and get to, choose to see each other.
to see each other for who we are.
Not who we were
or who we thought we would be
or how we seemed those million and one times when we all fought,
but who we are right this minute.
And we get to learn how to be together
and there for each other
as those right-now people.
Growing and changing still, 
but also still there and here for each other.
Right where we've always been.

It seems hard to actually know how to know the people we grew up with because we’ve all changed so thoroughly between then and now. And we’re changing still.

But I think it’s worth figuring out.

Because I want them to know this: I love you. I miss your face. I want to know what’s going on in your life. . I’m here when you need me. I need you, too.

I miss your face.

I love you.

Let’s make plans.

#the100dayproject #100daysofpressingpost 9/100

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