Outlining Family Wholeness (10 things I’m learning – Whole Together Family)

I’ve been thinking about what this idea of Whole Together Family means to me. I’d love to someday have a manifesto that tells the vision more coherently, but that’s somewhere down the line. Because right now I’m just figuring it out, thinking out loud, and piecing it together for me.

But even just having this idea at the back of my mind has really allowed to key in to our own dynamics and where we can move toward a more whole together mindset instead of a “we’re at war” mindset like it sometimes feels.

For now.

Here’s a few things about what Whole Together Family is and isn’t for me:

First off: Let’s get this clear right away: It’s not about being together all the time or doing things together all the time or loving all of the same things. We have way too many creative and assertive people in our house to mae that work.

We do share a lot of likes. But we do a lot of things by on our own, too.

It’s not exclusively about the kids, or the parents, or the family, or the individuals.

But it is about all of those things together.

It is:

  • choosing the family and the individuals
  • making room for everyone to explore interests, learn and grow.
  • embracing wholeness and sacrifice.
  • making room for mistakes and all the hard stuff as a part of life.
  • creating a safe space to grow and do better.
  • accepting, changing, empathizing, giving, growing, and actively seeking out our together freedom even when it means more work for ourselves.
  • believing we make each other better and God put us all here in this family with these weirdo problems, this strange skill-set and these specific dreams (as individuals and as a family) for a reason, but even so it still won’t ever be easy.
  • being rooted in Jesus, love, hope, grace, and faith.
  • realizing some times are harder than others, but there is still room for all of us here.
  • enjoying figuring out how it all works.

And that is my list for now. What might you add to this list?

What comes to your mind when you think about the phrase Whole Together Family?


Thanks for being here as my idea unfolds. I hope you find it helpful even in the middle of its becoming :)


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