Sometimes what makes you sad can feel a little bit ridiculous in the grand scheme of things. A few days ago I heard that our church was canceling the annual soccer camp. The kids were looking forward to spending mornings playing soccer with friends, and I was looking forward to maybe volunteering (because I do love soccer!). It was the right thing to do and I am so glad my church is being careful with the ministry events. It just wouldn’t be feasible to play soccer and maintain physical distancing as our local gov is recommending.
So yes. One week of fun set aside til next year.
Later that evening I found out our city won’t be opening the city pools this year.
I spent summers lifeguarding/teaching swim lessons as a college student. I love outdoor pools and watching my kids get more comfortable/skilled each summer. I look forward to it every year and I was holding out hope they’d find some guidelines and make it work. Having three months of summer fun canceled was a blow. Such is life right now. I know.
In the bigger picture it’s fairly minor. We have so many options for outdoor summer things and most likely the pools will get to open next summer. But it does make the many days of summer feel potentially long, hot, boring, and a touch more disappointing.
I had tears about the pool (probably partially just a growing overwhelm that culminated with the pool closure announcement, but still). Then I felt silly and a little petty.
But that is part of this whole season of all the things canceled isn’t it?
Yes, there are things that are harder.
Yes, there is reasoning behind it all.
Yes, we might get it in our heads, but that doesn’t mean we don’t get to feel our feelings, too.
So I guess what I’m saying is: cry if you need to, be frustrated with it all if you need to.
It’s ok to feel how you’re feeling.
However that may be.
We don’t need to stuff our feelings to be acceptable in any way. We don’t need to compare the validity of our feelings to the validity of someone else’s before we allow ourselves to feel that way.
We don’t even really have to cheer ourselves out of it.
There’s a place for it all, even if you’re just acknowledging it in your own mind.
Feel all the ways you need to.
Count and see the good.
Gather up your people.
Huddle in your corner.
Venture forth however you can.
As for us, I’ll be trying to find a new way to be this summer. But I guess that goes for all of us really.
Right here with you.
God’s got this.
All the days.